Category Archives: Wedding Etiquette

Guests Wedding Etiquette

Cash Gifts a No-No.

I recently came across a website based in Singapore that got me rather frustrated and sad about the state of some Chinese weddings. The site listed the amount of money guests should give to newlyweds depending on the venue and the type of food that will be served. The higher rated hotels warranted a heftier ‘ang pao’ or ‘lai see’ in Cantonese (red packet, which to put in plain English equals money) whereas a buffet meal would decrease the amount – reason being that the guests will have to serve themselves. And to top it off, the day of the week also affects the ang pao rate. What utter nonsense! This warped idea of gifts, in my opinion, defeats the purpose of weddings. The day is meant to be a celebration of unity; not to make sure you’ve got your money’s worth as a guest or to earn enough money to cover the cost of the wedding if you’re the newlyweds.

So point being, when it comes to your wedding, have some pride and don’t ask specifically for cash. At least, don’t state it in your wedding invitation (I received one several years back that stated ‘cash gifts are preferred’). It’s rather distasteful and leaves a sour feeling in the guests’ books.


Red Packet - Chinese Weddings

Photo credit: Home for Brides

Wedding Etiquette

Daddy’s Little Girl. How to Involve Him On Your Wedding Day.

This coming Sunday, Father’s Day, is the one day in the year that many dads will be pampered but let us not forget that there are plenty of other days (everyday!) for you to show him your love, not least your wedding day. See the suggestions from our friends at SimplyBridal on how to involve him in the celebrations; he’ll be ever so touched. Afterall, you’re always going to be his little girl.


Photo credit: SimplyBridal

Proposals Wedding Etiquette

Will You Marry Me?

Just when you thought social media couldn’t infiltrate our lives much more than it already has, news comes that some bloke proposed to his girlfriend via Twitter coupled with Vine (a shakey self-shot video). And to find out more on how the proposal evolved, read . No sweet words, or tears of joy. All executed in less than 140 characters for the world to read and see. Unconventional it may be, but what ever happened to privacy and intimacy? You’re allowed to share your excitement but c’mon, do it after you’ve actually got the girl to say yes.

My point is, fine you can be original and think out of the box when it comes to proposals or even weddings, but sometimes, a bit of tradition is a good thing. What ever happened to good old romance where a guy got down on one knee and poured his heart out as to why he wants to spend the rest of his life with his soulmate? Not to say that a proposal has to be all girlie and dreamy, but at least, give it some respect. So, when it’s your turn to conjure up a unique proposal, remember that different isn’t always the best way forward.


Photo credit: Luis Acosta / AFP – Getty Images via NBC News (image isn’t of the Twitter couple!)

Wedding Etiquette

Don’t Show Off.

Wedding Etiquette Wedding Food

Alcohol Buying Guide for Your Wedding.

I was at a wedding recently where they ran out of booze. But, there were no drunks in sight. What happened? They underestimated the number of drinks each individual would consume. By then, heads were turning and not to assume that all guests are alchies, but it’s considered a faux pas to have too little of a good thing. Just like at a dinner party, you always make sure that there’s enough food and drinks to keep the night rolling. Likewise, to avoid having any disgruntled guests (you know what many Hong Kong guests are like and one that I do not agree with; they want to get their money’s worth if they’ve given a cash gift) on your big day, use this alcohol calculator by Real Simple to estimate the number of bottles to order. Even if it means you’ll be left with extra bottles to carry home, allow extra budget for drinks. Take it out of your flower fund because honestly, guests will remember having a blast not by the amount of peonies you have but by the entertainment on the night.

*N.B. You may think some guests aren’t drinkers, thus underestimating the amount of alcohol to purchase. Remember, there are always dark horses out there.


Photo credits (clockwise from top left): Justin Hackworth Photography, Laura Faherty Photography via,  via Bride and Joy, Weddings in the Philippines, The Ashes Venue, Charleston Hospitality Catering, Laura Murray Photography via Martha Stewart Weddings

Wedding Package Inclusive of Alcohol
Most venues offer an all-inclusive package with free-flow wine and beer for a set number of hours. Whilst this option means you have one less item to think about, it in turn means you have no say in what type of wine will be served to your guests. It’s going to be House Wine.
The staff are also less likely to top-up the glasses as frequently because the less booze they serve, the less money the venue has to spend which means more of your money in their pockets. 

If you can, negotiate for this option. Many of the bigger vendors such as hotels will charge a ridiculous amount on corkage so work your magic to get yourselves a good deal. Don’t forget to include spirits in your calculation as well as the usual wine and beer.
One way to save money on drinks is to offer signature cocktails so you have more control over the amount of alcohol to be served. If your beverage package includes non-alcoholic drinks, check to see what juices and soft-drinks the venue provides and create a drinks menu using those ingredients.
Another way to ensure you’re within budget is to serve sparkling wine instead of champagne. Unless you’ve got guests who are bubbly connoisseurs, most guests won’t be able to tell the difference, especially if you’re mixing it into a cocktail.

Bride Wedding Etiquette

Spend Your Wedding Day with Guests.

Wedding Etiquette Wedding Stationery

Invitation Etiquette.

The wedding world can be overwhelming. You want the day to run smoothly, to be the most beautiful and for your guests to enjoy every moment of it. The last thing you want is to offend anyone and that starts right from when you send out your invitations, be it for your bridal shower or the big day itself. This etiquette guide by Emma J Designs is an excellent reminder about the details that may be overlooked when it comes to invitations. If you want your wedding to be a memorable one, put in the effort.

Photo credit: Emma J Design

Guests Wedding Etiquette

Thank Guests Yourself.

Wedding Etiquette

Weddings Aren’t a Competition.

Guests Wedding Etiquette

Be Subtle.